"I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born." Isaiah 66:9

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Things on my heart

There are a few things on my heart right now and I just wanted to share them.

First, my sweet friend, Kat, who has been through the heartache of miscarriage, tons of infertility stuff and is just trying to have a child to love and nurture, has decided to adopt internationally.  I am SOOO excited for them, but there has been a kink thrown into the plan right now, as they are trying to adopt from Taiwan and their current agency will not be allowed to continue adoptions after May 31st.  The prayer here is that Kat and her husband will be matched before that date with the child that God has chosen for them.  I ask you to join me in prayer for this situation.

Also on my heart is my sweet friend, Lori, who goes in for her second ultrasound on Friday and for those of you who have been there you know it is scary.  Loss torments you and steals a lot of joy from a subsequent pregnancy.

There are quite a few people who are on my heart who are still waiting for their miracle earthly babies and I just ache for them.  I wish that there was something that I could do for them, some way to make that happen, some way to make them feel loved and supported and to know that someone cares.  Please know that I do care.

Lastly, I just hate that infertility is so real.  I hate that there are so many people affected by it.  I hate that it still has a taboo feeling attached to it. I hate that people don't know the right words to say, the right way to handle IF people.  I hate that pregnancy announcements hurt people who have no children.  I hate that for some people it's not an option to use ART or to adopt.  I hate that finances have affects on the outcomes for some people.  I hate that once you are infertile, you remain infertile, even if you end up with children, through treatment or adoption.  I hate that for some of us our babies aren't made in the traditional way, that there is no spontaneity involved.  I'll just have to say that plain and simple I hate infertility and the things that it does to one's life.

I am eternally grateful for the advances of medicine and the doctors who choose to specialize in infertility for the right reasons (that would be NOT for making money!).  I believe the doctors at SIRM are amazing and if you're looking for an RE or a second/third/millionth opinion, they are so worth your time!  You can check them out here.

That's my heart for today, not sad, not mad, just my thoughts.


  1. I stand in agreement!!! HATE it!!!

  2. Love you friend. Sooooo with you. Praying for your sweet friend. Know all too well the ups and downs with IA.

  3. Thank you, Deni! You are AWESOME!!! Prayers are so powerful! I want to thank everyone praying for us and our future baby! THANK YOU!!! We can't wait to meet him/her! <3
    I agree with you on the infertility stuff too. It's horrible! I wish no one ever had to experience it and what it takes away from situations that should be so joyous and exciting! It makes everything so scary! If only we could have back that innocence we all once had when we first started trying. The excitement... before we knew the reality and ugliness of infertility. Infertility sucks!

  4. Oh man... you know, ever since I got pregnant, I've heard way too many times people just casually say "hey now maybe the next one will just happen and you guys won't even have to try for it!" - I never realized how much this would bother me! Just because we were blessed with a pregnancy, ITS NOT A CURE ALL! Do you think my husband's swimmers got the message that we are pregnant so they should change, even though they have nothing to do with the current growing babies now that they have done their duty? NO! Do you think your body knew to change its chemical makeup and get rid of that antibody? umm no! People have been so quick to forget our struggles, everything is ok now that we are pregnant! They so don't realize this really could be our only pregnancy, which I am ok with! We have been given the ultimate gift, and if it never happens again, I can die happy! But people can just be so ignorant! Ok, had to get that out! lol

  5. Amen, AMEN!

    Just today, as Lovie and I were out shopping for an outfit for his 1 yr portrait, 2 ladies stopped to admire Lleyton. The first said she had 12 grandchildren! The second said she was expecting her first grandchild and she "thought" it would never happen!

    Lady #1 went on to say that one of her grandchildren was adopted and she wondered "if" she could love her? I said "it matters not" and she said "I LOVE HER MORE", she's special and she's mine. Lady #2 said her daughter had struggled for 3 years TTC and is not expecting. I said "congratulations on your miracles", as I KNOW what it means to celebrate a miracle :)

    It matters not the means by which we are granted children, but what matters most is simply being a MOTHER.

    Love and huge hugs, I so feel you on this...all of it!


  6. Praying for your friends! Your prayers, and asking them for you friends is HUGE! You are a sweet soul!

  7. Very good post. Saying prayers for both and just realized Katrina had a blog. Thank you for linking. =)

  8. Fantastic post. Praying for your friends. You are such a special person, Deni.

  9. Thank you for putting words into many of the things I feel about infertility and about feelings about it!.