I saw my counselor today, which is always a good thing and helps me put things in a rational perspective. She is very kind and considerate and remembers things that I've told her (good thing since I'm pretty sure that's in the job description and I think she has notes there in front of her!). Anyhow, towards the end of my session today she asked me if I had read this book...
I told her that it made me feel confirmed in my feelings about my babies, made me feel good that they are in a place better than anything you or I could imagine. There is nothing that takes away the pain of losing children, but to know that I will see them again one day, which I knew in my heart, (but it was nice for more confirmation) gives me hope and it makes the pain not so heavy, not so permanent! I told her it also made me sad for the woman in the book, who had no confirmation, no closure on her loss, and for the many women who never mention their losses to anyone. The women who never celebrate that they knew life within or grieve completely that it was lost. This seems more true for the older generations of our parents, and our grandparents, who believe that therapy is hokey, medication is for the weak, and that if you just ignore a problem it will go away. Sadly, losing a child doesn't go away and it's amazing the women in nursing homes who will share with you that they lost a baby 58 years ago and never talked about it. It breaks my heart for them, and makes me want to reach out even more to those out there who have lost a child or suffered from infertility, to tell them "You are NOT alone!". I pray that our society continues to reach out, to make taboo topics not so taboo, and to comfort people who are hurting and offer help. I'm always here for anyone who needs to talk about these issues and am grateful each time someone who needs support reaches out, because I know what having support has done for me!
Now, go get this book! It's amazing and an easy quick read that will leave you feeling good and peaceful and hopeful and grateful!
A Day in the Life of the Lubbers 2017
1 week ago