"I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born." Isaiah 66:9

Tuesday, April 13, 2010


This subject is talked about in some books and a lot of their feelings are shared, but I have yet to find a book (even with all this positivity about openness) that discusses how to relate to your birthmother.

Baby Mama and I have had some rocky times, and some very great times. The thing is that we discussed the other day is this... there are no rules here. We are experiencing MAJOR things in our lives that are related, but are NOT the same, and it's very hard knowing how to talk, what to talk about, what is too much, what is not enough, and where to go from here.

I've read this over and over and people say that they are so grateful for their birthmothers, as am I. She is giving me probably the greatest gift of all times. It would just be super helpful to have a guideline of how to walk this journey. With that said, if anyone knows of any good blogs, books, articles, etc on this subject, please pass them to this readalholic!!!


  1. I wish I had some great advice or suggestions for how to navigate this new territory. All I can offer is to say to allow the Holy Spirit to guide you. He has promised to give wisdom when we ask and He will will faithful to all He has promised.

    Have you visited this blog before:

    She has a blogroll of open adoption bloggers that might be a good source of information. Some of them have very open adoptions, but perhaps there are a few that will be helpful. I also like Heart Cries:

    I hope this helps!

  2. I wish you had a guideline too...but just as grief of losing our babies goes, there is no guideline or rulebook either. Im sorry :( I just hope you are still feeling the love and support and prayers that so many people are sending you. I hope reading other's experiences and all of the books continues to help you. Lots of love, Nan xxxooo

  3. How to walk this Journey.....

    My 2 cents :)

    "Walk by FAITH, not by SIGHT"


  4. I stumbled across your blog today, have browsed through a couple of your posts. I am a first mom, closed adoption, reunited (kind-of) for one year. I'm glad to see that you are willing to learn about first moms & their experiences, that you want to learn how to communicate with the mom who is considering you to raise her child.

    Here is a great blog post, with some excellent blog recommendations at the end of it. I think you can learn a lot about the journey that first moms take from these blogs.


  5. This is a blog post with some questions to reflect on for people considering or who are in the process of adoption.