"I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born." Isaiah 66:9

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Grey's Anatomy

Anyone watch Grey's tonight? I won't give away any plot details for those of you who have it DVR'd, but the topic of the inate need to have children struck me profoundly. Sometimes these shows really do communicate something that is universal. In saying that it's not universal for everyone, some people don't want/need to be parents, but I do and I will admit that this show causes me to cry more often than not, tomight was no exception to that rule.

If you want to be a mother, or a father, there is nothing that will 'replace' that in your life. I will say that the over-simplification that was added at the end, implying that if you wanted to find out what type of parent you would be, you need to just try, left me a little stung. It's not always that easy, some people, I'm finding lots of people struggle to get there. Some people change their diets, take drugs, inject drugs into their bodies, inject sperm into their bodies, have their eggs removed-fertilized-and put back in their bodies, accept someone else's child as their own, all in the name of parenthood. For those of us, who do any or all of those things, parenthood hasn't come so easy and we continue to chase that dream, that hole in our soul looking to fulfill it.

Just saying that I'm praying for those of my friends who are currently trying to get pregnant, for those of you who have lost babies, for those of you who aren't able to get pregnant, for those whose miracle is coming true,and for those who are awaiting the perfect baby to come to your family. My prayer is that all of us who long to be parents become parents and know that joy. Knowing full well that we will lose sleep, that we will question everything we do with them, that we will miss out on social activities, that we will cry, that we will make sacrifices that we never imagined, and that some days we'll think we can't do it. Keep chasing that dream because I KNOW that it will be well worth it in the end!

Also sending up prayers for those parents who are watching their children battle diseases that seem stronger than them and for those parents who have had children and lost them, just prayer for your hearts, I can't imagine your grief.

As we consider the sacrifice that God made for us in His son, Jesus, may we remember that He knows our pain full well! Happy Easter!


  1. I just read something that touched my heart on Leah's blog. Her hubby wrote a guest post and made note of infertility being the second greatest cause of grief. How incredibly true. We lose parts of ourselves in the process and I wonder if we ever get them back? I wonder.

    Such a thoughtful post Deni and you capture all the emotions that encircle the pain. I pray for peace for all of us. If I could just find peace I know I would be okay. I see God working in my life, I do, but can't he work faster? That is my problem, I want it now. It's as if I had a taste of the sweetness and that makes me want it even more. However, I must remember to allow "him" to direct ourselves.

    And, never lose sight of this: John 3:16

    Happy Easter Sweet Friend.

    I love you and hope your weekend is full of JOY.


  2. I love this post. Identify with it. Relate to it. Cried over it. Smiled over it.
    Just love it!
    And so, so true.

    Happy Easter to you!!!!

  3. Thank you for the encouragement Deni, and i pray the same blessings upon you. I hope for you everyday, i think of you and pray for you everynight and sometimes in the middle of the day. I did not catch it, i often find that if i do decide to watch it i have to check to see what it's going to be about first. I can't watch private practice at all anymore. I wish it were that simple for us that all we have to do is "just try", but it's not, but! i will keep hoping and dreaming and praying for all of us. Hugs to you and I hope you have a Happy Easter:0)

  4. Wow, as always your posts are so touching and heartfelt. I am returning those prayers to you today as you desearve all these things and so much more too! *HUGS*

  5. My husband and I watched it last night with mouths open. Can we not escape this baby talk? Have a very happy Easter!

  6. Happy Easter Deni!

    I didn't catch the episode of Grey's Anatomy (I have a regular Thursday night commitment and no DVR), but when I use to be able to watch it regularly I would often cry, not sure what it is about that show!

    Since I just recently found your blog, I spent some time the other night reading through your old posts. It touched me so much. I relate to so much of your story. Hearing about the loss of your first baby reminded me so much of the loss of mine. I could relate so much to the grief, sadness, loneliness, and hope you wrote of. It was wonderful to read about how God brought Cala into your life. I will be praying for you every step of this journey. I can't wait to see God's plan unfold.

  7. You know, I thought of you while watching as I thought of myself. I know my situation is so very different; however, I wish I had the chance to have a loving husband with whom I could have children with. People tell me all of the time I should just have a child, etc; however, it just isn't the same. I want to raise a child with a mom and dad. Watching the show was eye opening to me for many reasons.

    I also cry, laugh, and many things while watching, but I wish I had a choice right now with a wonderful man who I was madly in love with. Then I get scared thinking when/if that man comes along, what if there are problems. So, fear . . . lots of it that I hope resolves itself.

    Continuing to keep you and your family in prayer.