"I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born." Isaiah 66:9

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Random Thoughts for Today

#1. I'm very excited because my sister is coming to Tyler on Friday! I love my sister and miss her like crazy all the time! She'll get to meet some of my friends and some of my youth, as we're going to see Toby Mac Friday night--fun fun!!

#2. This weather really helps to keep me from staying in a funk. I think that God knows that I'm trying to stay out of it and He's helping me out there. It also helps that Jake drives his Jeep to work, so I can ride with him when we run errands--I like that about him!

#3. Another friend who is approaching adoption brought this up yesterday, but I second this...It doesn't help for people to say the following "Oh, you're adopting, you'll totally get pregnant now!". This is not a means to an end, this is a decision completely seperate from that. We didn't decide to adopt in hopes of becoming pregnant. We felt called to adopt and will do so for that reason.

#4. I went to Sam's today (following a trip yesterday) where I discovered that they have purple and gold calla lillies in boxes. This sent me over the moon, as I told Sean a few weeks ago that I wanted to do a flower bed of just Calla Lillies for my Cala baby! So, there they were in the best colors ever (GEAUX TIGERS!!), and so I got some yesterday and went back for more today. Tomorrow I will spend the day weeding and planting LOTS of bulbs (I may have gotten more than just those calla lillies!!).

#5. I'm hoping that even though Lent is over on Sunday, I can keep limiting my sweets intake. I found that I was a sugar addict, and this cleanse has been nice (not that I cut out all sugar, but all sweets!). I'm trying to eat better and make healthier choices for myself, and my family.

#6. Anyone have any insight on Juicers, I'm planning on buying one. My friend, Caryn, has one and uses it all the time, so we've chatted about it, but if any of you have one and use it, tell me about it.

#7. I appreciate people who don't forget that I've lost two babies, and that I haven't gotten pregnant again in the past 10 months since my miscarriage. Lots of people who do get pregnant move on from those of us who aren't and forget. That hurts and is very hard and it strains friendships. But I have quite a few friends who haven't forgotten and that I appreciate. I got the sweetest call from one of my dear friends today and she said "It just makes me so sad to hear how sad you are and that monthly rollercoaster. I don't want you to think that just because I'm pregnant I don't think about you or want that for you too." (This was after catching up on my blog). That is one of those things that I count as true friendship, when things aren't easy and they aren't pretty, but people still show up for you. So, thank you to her and my Fab5 girls who are expecting, but consider my feelings too!

#8. I think I might have had (or still do a little) a serious problem with sweets considering I have LITERALLY dreamed about eating them at least 4 times since I gave them up. Sad, huh?!!?

#9. My husband is funny. If you don't know him, you're missing out, because he's really funny!

#10. I LOVE working with youth. Each of my girls is so very special to me, they are funny, sweet, enlightening, and REAL. It just makes my heart swell to hear them talk and share and be real. Everyone should have a job they love as much as I do mine! (not to rub it in for those of you who don't, that makes me sad for you, and I've been there!).

#11. Blue Sparrow set up a tribute for her sweet baby, Bryston, born too soon. She's calling for us to do random acts of kindness. Go check out her post on it! I did one today, and it seems wrong to even say it was my kindness because it made me feel so good. I wasn't going to mention it on here, as I feel that takes some of the random-ness away, but I have to share this so others can do the same. I donated blood today in Walker Rainey's name. He is a precious 2 year old fighting rabdoid cancer, visit his site and send them some love and prayers!!! (http://www.caringbridge/visit/walkerrainey) If you'd like to give in his name too, his sponsor # is 048581 (not sure how far that reaches, but worth a try!). Thanks Blue Sparrow for starting this movement of random acts of kindness!

These are my ramblings for today. Goodnight!


  1. I am so glad I met you. You are amazingly strong.

  2. I love all the randomness and the joy and hope they contain.

  3. Have fun with your sister! I have a magic bullet that I do smoothies with but its not exactly a juicer but I do like it. Thats awesome that you gave blood to such a good cause! Thank you for mentioning the MSM!

  4. One symptom of candida is sugar cravings - have you looked into that at all? It's amazing what we crave when we stop eating certain things - I craved a tall glass of milk the short time I cut out dairy last fall. I was having dreams about milk, too!

  5. Glad you are able to enjoy some of the wonderful things it sounds like are going on...especially love the thought of all those pretty flowers!!!

    I swear, if one more person told me, "Adopt, you'll get pregnant." I think you would have seen me on the news going postal. And when we tried...and the country closed...well, those same people had the NERVE to say, "See--you just needed to adopt!" because we knew that the ountry wasn't looking good and did IVF and got pregnant with Matthew...I could NOT BELIEVE people's nerve. Like my heartache over that little girl we'd never get to parent was what was required to get pregnant? Oy...people just don't get it sometimes.
    A lot of the times, really.

    Still, still, still thinking of your little O'Brien every day!

  6. Remembering Layla and Michael always....and oh how I relate to strained friendships of those who have moved on and forgotten what this sturggle is like. It's hell, ain't easy in any respect and we certainly remember those who show love and support.

    Glad Renae is coming to see you! Have an amazing time and I'm happy you are feeling better. Keep letting your hair blow in the wind and thank Jake for that Jeep!!


  7. On the subject of calla lillies -- my in-laws brought me a beautiful potted one (gold) last weekend and it sits on my table and reminds me of you! :) Just want you to know that, as a woman who is pregnant after multiple losses, I will never, ever forget. I know what it felt like for years to be forgotten by friends who had moved forward, and I make it my mission to continue to support those who have been where I've been. Love ya, girl! I won't stop praying for you.