"I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born." Isaiah 66:9

Thursday, April 22, 2010


There aren't words to say how much I loved O'Brien, how much he meant to me, or all of the things that we went through together. We were best friends for 11 years. He was with me following my horrible breakup, my seperation from God, my struggle back there, every good and bad thing that has happened since I got him in February of 1999. He was the cutest dog in America, and I mean that. I told him on pretty much a daily basis just that. We snuggled, we talked, after both of my miscarriages he licked away my tears when no one else even knew I was crying. I'm not sure how to just go on without him. I've never had another animal for this long, but there is a bond between us that I cannot explain.

I can't really go into details, but I now know that O'Brien is gone, for sure gone. I suspected the worst and it happened, coyotes apparently come in our backyard, and they got him. I'm sure he's basking in heaven right now, loving having his belly rubbed, I hope by Layla and Michael.

So, next week I'll be doing a memorial flowerbed for him. I think I'll fill it with french fries because when I say that dog loved french fries, those who knew him know! My friend Michelle, asked me one night (she came over with Wendy's) why he was giving her the death stare, and I told her, "He wants a fry!" She was like, "are you serious?", "yep", so she obliged and he pranced happily away with his treasure, then of course came back for more. That and Johnny's pizza (mainly the crust), I guess that is what happens when you get a dog while your young and irresponsible in college. But he loved me and I loved him, and I know that I'll miss him forever. I'll have other dogs, maybe soon, but none will be him, none could ever replace him. I've already started a shutterfly photobook for him, but if any of my friends/family have pictures of him, I'd love to have them!!

O'Brien, I love you and I miss you and I wish you were here with me, but I'm sure we'll meet again! Thank you for being the cutest dog in America, being my sweet Mooshy bug, and for loving me unconditionally even when I wasn't very lovable!


  1. Awe I saw your blog title and I was reeeeally hoping you had found him. What a precious baby dog O'brien was. I'm so sorry.

  2. I'm so sorry that you have lost your best buddy and companion! Dogs are family and losing O'brien must be so painful! I am so glad that you have such wonderful memories to treasure. I'm sure Layla and Michael are glad to have O'brien with them! I am thinking about you and praying for your healing.

  3. I was hoping too this blog was good news, and I shed tears with you now because I see that it's not. How sorry I am for your loss of sweet little O'Brien. What a precious face! I adore him, even though I never met him! How close we get to our precious "fur babies." They love us even when we are unloveable and ask nothing in return. I think the flowerbed is a great idea. By the way, my Molly and Maggie LOVE french fries too! And spaghetti!

    Much love to you, friend.


  4. Oh Deni, I am so sorry! I absolutely know that Layla & Michael are up there loving on O'Brien (and feeding him the MOST glorious french fries ever!). If you need some puppy loving just give me a call and I will bring Bear right over! He's a good snuggle buddy, too! I hope your Friday gets better!

  5. I am so sorry. Pets are family and it is heart breaking when they are gone. I lost my cat of 15 years not too long ago and I still miss her. Thinking of you and will pray for you.

  6. Oh no! I am so very sorry. I know you are just heartbroken. The love that our pets give us is so very unique and special. Their unconditional love is so amazing and very much appreciated. I am so sorry that you've lost your precious friend. Please know that my heart just breaks for you right now. You are in my prayers hon. Hugs.

  7. Your post brought me to tears. I feel for you. I know how it feels to miss your constant companion. O'brien will be waiting for you at the gates of Heaven, ready to give you those same sweet kisses.

  8. Sweetie, Im so sorry your fear was confirmed, I was really hoping this post was good news. I know almost exactly how you feel, as when I lived in Reno, my sweet cat was taken by coyotes also, its such a tragedy, I am sooooo sorry. What a good puppy dog he was to you and I think its wonderful that you are planting his very own flowerbed that you can visit and remember all of those sweet memories you had with him. Sending an abundance of love and hugs to you. Again, just so sorry. Love you xxx

  9. Hi Deni !

    So sorry he didnt come back to you !
    He is the cutest dog ! Love his eyes ; so sweet and kind looking .
    I know he felt you loved him a´ll the time .
    So sorry he had to go to heaven .
    Sending you big hugs - Love Angie

  10. OH Deni,
    I'm sending you hugs and lots of love .

  11. I am so very sorry Deni! Sending lots of hugs your way!

  12. You have me in tears this beautiful afternoon! I am so sorry things didn't turn out how you hoped with O'Brien. That dog sure did love you! I will always remember him hanging out on the balcony of your apartment with us when you were still in Dallas.

  13. I'm so sorry to hear about O'Brien. I think the memorial flowerbed will be a wonderful tribute. I am thinking about you!

  14. I am so sorry Deni. I feel for you so much, as I can't imagine losing my little pooch Annie. I never had a dog before her and I never knew it was possible to have such love for a pet. She has been a comfort and a companion to me through infertility and loss in a way that no person could ever be. I know this must be so hard to lose O'Brien who has been your friend through all you have been through. Sending hugs and prayers your way.

  15. My Kindred Spirit,

    I will never view a French Fry the same way ever again :)

    Pets are just more than pets, they are family, care for us unconditionaly, and love us infinitely. I do believe ALL DOGS go to HEAVEN :)

    Sending you love, as I know you are hurting...just wish I could do more :(

    Just know that I love you...
    your kindred spirit

  16. (((HUGS)))
    I'm so sorry! R.I.P. O'Brien. :(

  17. You always leave the sweetest comments on my blog, and I thank you. I always read them and think, SHE GETS IT. Yet I have never clicked over to your blog and I'm so sorry. But I have just become a follower of yours so I'll be stopping by a lot more often.

    I'm so sorry about O'Brien. Pets become part of our families, and he was your baby. I'm really sorry for your loss. I also hope he's in heaven getting a lot of belly rubs, and running around and being the happiest dog in the world. Thinking of you.

  18. I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine losing such a close companion for so long. I'm here crying reading your post. I was so hoping he would come home. Sending you lots of hugs!